100 Things Guys Should Know About Girls

June 24, 2008

I noe u guys must b long waiting 4 dis list..my fwens did pressure me 2 post it up fast..why do you all want to read my blog so much that you keep nagging me to update..sry lar..nid time 2 do research mar..summore exam jus finish..

okok,so here's da list:

1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house. They run around in their underwear just like you do.

2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be mad.

3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat.

4. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.

5. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.

5.5. Don't make her to wait for your kiss.

6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it.

7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.

7.5. It's ok to get HORNY at times.

8. If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.

8.5. If you DO sleep with them, don't tell your friends that you did.

9. You can be dirty minded in private, really... Most of them are not offended by it, I can guarantee you that. ;)

10. Not all of them eat like birds; a lot of them can eat like whales.

11. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're such a sore loser.

11.5. Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!

12. Every girl should sooner or later get three things from her boyfriend: a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.

13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.

14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the shit out of him and shut the f*ck off him.

15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer. They wouldn’t want to feel like a concubine.

16. Never ever, ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.

16.5. Get her mad. Then kiss her.

17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.

18. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.

19. Don't flirt with their moms. It's just freaky.

20. Don't be freaked out by pms. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like shit, so be understanding. (Like wtf)

21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.

22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.

23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.

24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.

25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.

26. Memorise their god damn birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.

27. When going out, at least apply some cologne, girls feel more comfortable but don’t over do it.

27.5 Wear decently.

28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's Day.(even if you did,don't remind her) It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful.

29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.

30. Girls are pretty, but yours is the Prettiest!

31. Don't tell us when you think other girls are hot.

32. If you don't act like soap-opera guys, don't expect us to dress like Victoria Secret models.

33. Don't text or call someone when you're on a date . . . This is telling us "Oh,the other person is more important than you"

34. This is how we see it . . . Don't call = Don't Care.

34.5. Which also means that if we don't call, take the hint.

35. Girls never say it, but they really want you to kiss them so that they can pretend to resist.=)

36. We like you to be a little jealous . . . but overly possessive is not necessary.

37. Putting things in our butt does not turn us on.

38. Return favors: we massage, you massage; we go down, you go down;

39. We're allowed to be late . . . you are not.

40. Eye contact is key.

41. Don't take longer to get ready than we do.

42. Laugh at our jokes.

43. Six words . . . honesty, honesty, honesty. Sincere,sincere,sincere.

44. Girls can be groupies. Guy groupies are stalkers.

45. We never have to wonder if your orgasm was real.

46. Do not start with us. You will not win... not kidding .. we ALWAYS win

47. Would you like it if a guy treated your sister that way? We didn't think so.

48. If you ask nicely, we usually answer the same way.

49. We will never have enough clothes or shoes!

50. We have an excuse to act bitchy at least once a month.

51. Open the door for us no matter where we are . . . even at our house and getting into the car.

52. We love surprises!

53. We liked to be kissed softly, not with an iron tongue.

54.Pay attention to the little things we do, because they mean the most.

55. Clean your room before we come over.

56. Always brush your teeth before you see us . . . a fresh mouth and white teeth are a necessity.

57. Even though you are sometimes insensitive and hurt us, we still love you with everything we are.

58. Sometimes even when you think we hate you, we don't, we just want you to apologize so we can be allowed to love you again

59. Don't act hard around your friends.

60. Sensitive guys are great . . . but crying more than we do in a movie just isn't right.

61. Guys who are good cuddlers = guys who know how to satisfy a woman.

62. If you are not a good dancer, please be self-aware.

63. Just because a girl doesn't pick up on the first ring doesn't mean she's not waiting by the phone.

64. Don't say you love me if you don't mean it.

65. When the girls get together, we talk about EVERYTHING. Meaning my best friends know everything about you.

66. We will leave if you lie.

67. We love it when you hug us from behind and whisper in our ear.

68. "Fine" is never an appropriate response when I ask you how I look.

69. Most of the time when we fantasise, it's about you.

70. We expect you to call. All the time.

71. We're more forgiving of you than we really should be.

72. Shoes determine whether you're fashionable or not.

73. You should never tell us what to do.

74. If I slept over, you owe me breakfast.

75. If you ask us out directly, we will say yes.

76. We're very impressed when you ask for us advice.

77. We're unimpressed with a man who doesn't take the lead.

78. We're in heaven when you hold our hand,waist..etc.

79. If I'm not feeling loved, I will start looking....

80. A lady should always be greeted with kisses.

81. Even nice girls like hushed dirty talk in public.

82. It's cheating as soon as you're doing something with her that you wouldn't want us to see, hear, read...

83. For the record: we'd rather you break up with us than cheat.

84. Hugs and kisses must be given at all times.ALL TIMES.

85. Shave; no matter how cool you think your goatte or beard or mustache looks, we hate it.

86. Even if you think it is cool to burp, fart, or emitt other strange gases from your body, it is not.

87. If you did something wrong or even if you didn't,apologise

88. Be spontaneous; dinner and a movie won't always cut it.

89. Don't ever do anything wrong (well not anything). girls remember things for life and anything you did wrong will be used against you in the future.

90. Girls generally don't like giving head, so you better be ready to reciprocate if and when you get it.

91. We think about you all the time.

92. Under NO CIRCUMSTANCES will we have a threesome.

93. If you refuse to dance, expect us to dance with other guys...and lots of them.

94. Think before you speak...It'll make a world of difference.

95. Don't screw us over...you heard about what "scorned women" are capable of.

96. You have to tell a girl how you feel about her...we make no assumptions.

97. We're sensitive too...be gentle (and we're not talking about our hearts here guys).

98. If a girl forgives you for something you’ve done to her you should feel like the luckiest guy in the world. You should constantly be doing everything in your power to make it up to her.

99. Most importantly: we are always right; so don't forget it.

100. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in just a nanosecond.

CREDITS to: Chee Li Kee,Long Tien Yi,Wong Shi Ning,...etc.

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